The past week has been hell. It all began with a phone call from Braden's school last Tuesday afternoon: Can you please come pick Braden up from school? He just threw up.
Never mind that I was in the middle of nursing Colin, Casey was in the middle of a nap, and my husband was out of town for the evening. I did what I had to do. I picked him up, and over the course of the next few hours, he proceeded to throw up in the car, the bed, the floor, and miraculously, the toilet.
The days following involved a ton of bananas, bleach, laundry, movies, the infection of Casey, and, the icing on the cake, the call on Saturday night from the babysitter informing us that Braden's vomiting had recurred (after four days!).
My husband, who returned home on Wednesday, and I were both exhausted. I began wishing that I would fall ill with the stomach flu, because that would mean my husband would have to take care of all three kids, and at least I would get a break. Yesterday, he admitted to me he felt the same. Then it became a game of I want to get sick; No, I want to get sick! We didn't discuss what would happen if we both got sick at the same time. But since I birthed him three children and endured 27 months of pregnancy, I would argue that he would have to be the one to step it up. That's only fair.
Last night, both Braden and Casey were vomit-free, and were sleeping soundly in their beds. I was ready to finally, FINALLY, have a night of peace, when baby Colin started crying an hour or so after I put him down to bed.
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Reclaiming the Night
Three months ago I said hello to my newborn, and goodbye to my evenings.
I cherish my evenings. On hard days, it is always a countdown until the kids' bedtime at 8pm. After 8pm, my time is my own again. For 2-3 hours, I can do whatever I want. I can have a nice big glass of wine. I can watch trashy shows. I can clean or email or read or make phone calls all without children tugging at my legs. It is glorious. It's my only true "me" time, and I cherish it.
Alas, I lost it on November 13, 2013, when my third son was born.
Newborns take all of your energy, that's for sure. They are an immense amount of work (particularly on top of two other rambunctious boys). But during the day, it is much easier to handle. Because I'm used to being busy during the day. It's normal to be busy during the day. But newborns are on an around the clock schedule. And once my third baby entered this world, an all too familiar feeling descended upon me.
I started dreading the nights.
I cherish my evenings. On hard days, it is always a countdown until the kids' bedtime at 8pm. After 8pm, my time is my own again. For 2-3 hours, I can do whatever I want. I can have a nice big glass of wine. I can watch trashy shows. I can clean or email or read or make phone calls all without children tugging at my legs. It is glorious. It's my only true "me" time, and I cherish it.
Alas, I lost it on November 13, 2013, when my third son was born.
Newborns take all of your energy, that's for sure. They are an immense amount of work (particularly on top of two other rambunctious boys). But during the day, it is much easier to handle. Because I'm used to being busy during the day. It's normal to be busy during the day. But newborns are on an around the clock schedule. And once my third baby entered this world, an all too familiar feeling descended upon me.
I started dreading the nights.
Friday, February 14, 2014
The Flu that Stole Christmas
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| Christmas circa 1988 |
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| Christmas circa 2006. Opening our gifts from Santa. |
But as our family has grown, traditions have shifted. My sister and I are hardly the "kids" anymore, and my kids are now old enough to ask for gifts from Santa and wonder how it is he fits down our chimney. So, this year, in part because we had a newborn and in part because we felt we were ready to start our own traditions, we had Christmas at our house. My mom and stepfather made the trip here, and my sister and her new husband planned to join us as well. It was the same participants, different venue.
Alas, a few days before my sister was set to arrive, she called to tell me she was sick. My sister rarely ever gets sick (a few Thanksgivings ago she was the sole survivor from the stomach flu that ravaged the rest of the family). The sickness involved fever, sore throat, body aches, cough, etc.
She had the flu.
Given that we have a newborn in the house, I freaked out a little. I first consulted Dr. Google, followed by my OB. The consensus was that anyone with the flu should not come into our house.
This meant we would celebrate our first Christmas without my sister. Ever.
Now granted, my sister just got married, and soon, she will start her own Christmas tradition too. There will be Christmases we won't spend together. But I need baby steps. It was enough that we were changing venue. The absence of a key participant was a lot to take!
Damn you, flu. You stole my sister.
The flu didn't ruin our Christmas, of course. The boys loved celebrating at their own house, and were thrilled with Santa's booty. But it wasn't the same. (Good news is, she spent her Christmas with her in-laws, which means we get her back next year! Venue to be determined).
This flu season has been a doozy, though. According to the CDC, 41 states now have "widespread flu." Young people and middle aged adults are at particular risk this year. If you haven't gotten your flu shot, it's not too late to get vaccinated - the flu can continue as late as May. For more information on the flu, check out the CDC website here and the OTC website here. If you are unlucky enough to get the flu, below is a graphic with some tips for easing the symptoms.
Disclosure: I received compensation for this post as part of the CHPA OTC Safety Ambassador Program. All the opinions reflected here are my own
Monday, February 3, 2014
Learning Him
When I gave birth to my third son, Colin, on November 13th, he came out a stranger. Sure, there was an instant love and familiarity, but I still didn't know him. Would he be calm, or high strung? Laid back, or fussy? A good or bad sleeper? A good or bad eater? Serious or silly?
I had no idea. And it is that unknown that I think makes the first weeks of the newborn period so scary.
On my first day home alone with Colin, I was petrified. You would think the third time around that I would avoid the whole oh my god, don't leave me alone with the baby, I don't know what I'm doing anxiety, but alas, it gets me every time. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to get him to sleep. That I wouldn't know what to do to soothe him if he started crying. That he and I would both be miserable, and exhausted.
I'm not going to lie, those first few weeks were rough. But then, slowly but surely, I started to learn about my precious son.
I had no idea. And it is that unknown that I think makes the first weeks of the newborn period so scary.
On my first day home alone with Colin, I was petrified. You would think the third time around that I would avoid the whole oh my god, don't leave me alone with the baby, I don't know what I'm doing anxiety, but alas, it gets me every time. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to get him to sleep. That I wouldn't know what to do to soothe him if he started crying. That he and I would both be miserable, and exhausted.
I'm not going to lie, those first few weeks were rough. But then, slowly but surely, I started to learn about my precious son.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
The Winter of My Skin's Discontent
I try to avoid blogging about the weather, but let me just put it out there that this winter has SUCKED. Having a baby in the fall is difficult as it is, with the general darkness and cold and claustrophobia of being stuck indoors. I always hope for the best, but this winter, I can honestly say I can't imagine it being any worse (okay, that's not true. More snow would be worse. But it's pretty damn bad.). It's been polar vortexes and negative wind chills and gray day after gray day.
I myself can deal with the cold. But throw in a newborn and two other kids with the most sensitive skin known to man, and we are pretty much home bound. When I do take them outside, the physical ramifications are apparent.
Case in point: my oldest sons poor chapped hands:
We forgot to send him to school with gloves on Monday (and by we, I mean my husband, not that I'm pointing fingers or anything). Four days later, he is still red and splotchy and asking for a bandaid to make it all better.
Additionally, despite only going from the door to the car, my two month old has developed eczema across his face. My three year old looks like he has been slapped on both cheeks they are so red. And my lips have begun spontaneously cracking and bleeding. It's fun stuff.
I generally use lip balm and petroleum jelly or some other kind of lotion on our skin when it's frigid outside, but it only does so much. We just weren't meant to live in the cold, I suppose. (And we also weren't meant to live in the sun, as we burn ridiculously easily, so really, I'm not sure where we are meant to live).
In any event, OTC Safety has a great article about how to protect your skin in the winter (you can click here for the link). And if you are using any moisturizers or lotions, be sure to check the drug facts label to be sure of the ingredients and safe application.
Here are some additional tips below (click to enlarge) - stay warm!
Disclosure: I received compensation for this post as part of the CHPA OTC Safety Ambassador Program. All the opinions reflected here are my own.
I myself can deal with the cold. But throw in a newborn and two other kids with the most sensitive skin known to man, and we are pretty much home bound. When I do take them outside, the physical ramifications are apparent.
Case in point: my oldest sons poor chapped hands:
We forgot to send him to school with gloves on Monday (and by we, I mean my husband, not that I'm pointing fingers or anything). Four days later, he is still red and splotchy and asking for a bandaid to make it all better.
Additionally, despite only going from the door to the car, my two month old has developed eczema across his face. My three year old looks like he has been slapped on both cheeks they are so red. And my lips have begun spontaneously cracking and bleeding. It's fun stuff.
I generally use lip balm and petroleum jelly or some other kind of lotion on our skin when it's frigid outside, but it only does so much. We just weren't meant to live in the cold, I suppose. (And we also weren't meant to live in the sun, as we burn ridiculously easily, so really, I'm not sure where we are meant to live).
In any event, OTC Safety has a great article about how to protect your skin in the winter (you can click here for the link). And if you are using any moisturizers or lotions, be sure to check the drug facts label to be sure of the ingredients and safe application.
Here are some additional tips below (click to enlarge) - stay warm!
Disclosure: I received compensation for this post as part of the CHPA OTC Safety Ambassador Program. All the opinions reflected here are my own.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Five Years Ago Yesterday
Yesterday was January 26th. I knew it was a significant day in one way or another, but I honestly couldn't remember why. An ex boyfriend's birthday? A graduation of sorts? An appointment I was forgetting?
It clicked yesterday afternoon. It was none of the above.
January 26th, 2009, was the day that I went back to work after my first son was born. Five years ago.
It makes sense that the date is forever etched in my mind. From the moment I gave birth to him, that date loomed - January 26th. From a formal perspective, it meant the end of my maternity leave. But it meant so much more to me than that. It meant the end of my days at home with my baby. It meant nannies and childcare and breast pumps. It meant fitting back into business casual clothing and rejoining the professional world and continuing on with life as it was before, pre-baby. It meant becoming Shannon, the lawyer, once again.
But of course, I wasn't only Shannon, the lawyer, anymore. I was also Shannon, the mother.
Monday, January 20, 2014
Overwhelmed
It has been a while since I have posted. I keep meaning to, and I have several ideas for emotional, thought provoking posts. I title them in my head and think of how I will structure them, and I feel all satisfied with myself. I'll draft that later today, I think.
I haven't yet written any of them. And this is not one of those posts.
The truth is, life is getting away from me a bit. I guess I should not be surprised as a new mother of three. Every minute of every day is filled with a preschool pick up or a nursing session or a meal preparation or refereeing or rocking to sleep or cleaning or folding laundry or bedtimes or a multitude of other things that I don't even feel like listing or thinking of. In between that, I am still trying to bathe and maintain friendships and volunteer for school activities and go to doctor's appointments and host playdates and blog and a multitude of other things that I don't even feel like listing of thinking of. I feel like I'm constantly on catch up. Like I just need a minute to breathe, to take a break, and there just isn't one. And I can't think of when I will get one next.
I am holding it together, generally. Because there's no other option. Because I still do get joy out of my day.
But I have gotten a bit derailed.
I haven't yet written any of them. And this is not one of those posts.
The truth is, life is getting away from me a bit. I guess I should not be surprised as a new mother of three. Every minute of every day is filled with a preschool pick up or a nursing session or a meal preparation or refereeing or rocking to sleep or cleaning or folding laundry or bedtimes or a multitude of other things that I don't even feel like listing or thinking of. In between that, I am still trying to bathe and maintain friendships and volunteer for school activities and go to doctor's appointments and host playdates and blog and a multitude of other things that I don't even feel like listing of thinking of. I feel like I'm constantly on catch up. Like I just need a minute to breathe, to take a break, and there just isn't one. And I can't think of when I will get one next.
I am holding it together, generally. Because there's no other option. Because I still do get joy out of my day.
But I have gotten a bit derailed.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Best Of
As we leave 2013 behind, my friend and fellow blogger Darcy had the great idea to come up with a "Best of 2013" list. She got several bloggers on board, and we are all linking to each other (so go to Darcy's blog to see her list, and she'll link to another blogger, etc.). This normally isn't my kind of thing, so at first I was a little nervous, but as I drafted the list, I realized it was almost therapeutic. It brought back memories and really made me reflect on the year that was - so thank you, Darcy!
Without further adieu...
Best book - It is shameful how little I read in 2013. The problem is I discovered Netflix (see below). However, I was lucky enough to read one of the best books I've read in a long time - Monkey Mind - A Memoir of Anxiety. If you've ever had any bout of anxiety (or even if you haven't), you will love this book. It examines anxiety in a humorous way, while at the same time imparting the seriousness of the condition. It is brave and honest. I laughed out loud multiple times, and in some ways, it made me understand myself a little bit more. I highly recommend it!
Best TV series - It is shameful how much I watched on Netflix/HBOGo, etc. in 2013. Mad Men, Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, Homeland, the Wire, and House of Cards, among others. Yes, I watched every single episode of ALL of them! They were all great, but Breaking Bad is by far the best show that has ever been on television. If you haven't seen it, I'm jealous. There's nothing like experiencing it the first time around.
Best vacation - In 2013 we traveled to Cincinnati, Disney World, Cape Cod, and Washington, VA. They were all great, but first prize goes to Washington, VA - the home of the Inn at Little Washington - a destination in and of itself. We took our time getting there, stopping at Virginia wineries on the way (not the best wine, but hey, it's wine, who cares?) and cozying up at a B&B before going to the Inn for dinner. It was only one night, and it was snowing and cold, but it was heaven. We hope to go back in 2014.
Best meal - My pregnancy interfered a bit with my foodie tendencies, so unsurprisingly my best meals were enjoyed before and after. It's a toss up between The Inn at Little Washington (see above - in February) and Minibar (in December). Both of these meals were ridiculously overpriced, but to me, it was worth it. Wine flights and multiple courses (over 20 at Minibar!) - sign me up!
Best movie - I don't get out to the movies much these days. But I did thoroughly enjoy This is the End this past summer, so much so that I devoted an entire blog post to it. It was weird. And stupid. But I laughed out loud in a theater by myself, so that says something.
Best day - November 13, 2013. Duh! I got to meet this guy:
Second best day - October 5, 2013 - my sister's wedding. Beautiful!
Best girl's night out - December 12, 2013. Some of my friends took me out to Rosa Mexicano to celebrate my 35th birthday, the arrival of Colin, and the termination of my nine month sobriety. It was a fabulous night, with some fabulous women - including fellow bloggers Valerie and Darcy, a good friend from high school, a good friend from college, and three of my best friends from DC. Worlds collided, and it was awesome. How could it not be when there is tequila involved? (You can even see a picture of me getting a shot disguised as a cake on Darcy's blog - scroll to the bottom).
Best kids excursion - To the National Zoo, in August. I actually usually hate the zoo, but it was raining that day - who knew the best time to visit the zoo is in the rain? It was empty, and for the first time, I felt like I could handle my two kids in a public place without yelling or running or losing my shit. It was a good day.
Best Blog Post on My Blog - My favorite ones are never the most popular ones, but I think my best of the year is this one: I'm in Love with a Boy. The most popular one this year, by far, is this one: Why are Lawyers so Miserable?
Best Blog Post on Any Blog- Kelle Hampton's birth story on the arrival of her son on her blog, Enjoying the Small Things, had me in tears. (And if that one makes you cry, check out the birth story of Nella, her daughter born with down syndrome - have tissues ready).
Best Beauty Product - Ummmmmmmmmmmm. This one is a joke, people. I am lucky to get a shower every other day, let alone wear make up or use anything to preserve my aging skin. I do use Pantene, by the way. High quality stuff.
Now mosey on over to Darcy's blog, No Monsters in my Bed, to see her Best Of list!
Without further adieu...
Best book - It is shameful how little I read in 2013. The problem is I discovered Netflix (see below). However, I was lucky enough to read one of the best books I've read in a long time - Monkey Mind - A Memoir of Anxiety. If you've ever had any bout of anxiety (or even if you haven't), you will love this book. It examines anxiety in a humorous way, while at the same time imparting the seriousness of the condition. It is brave and honest. I laughed out loud multiple times, and in some ways, it made me understand myself a little bit more. I highly recommend it!
Best TV series - It is shameful how much I watched on Netflix/HBOGo, etc. in 2013. Mad Men, Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, Homeland, the Wire, and House of Cards, among others. Yes, I watched every single episode of ALL of them! They were all great, but Breaking Bad is by far the best show that has ever been on television. If you haven't seen it, I'm jealous. There's nothing like experiencing it the first time around.
Best vacation - In 2013 we traveled to Cincinnati, Disney World, Cape Cod, and Washington, VA. They were all great, but first prize goes to Washington, VA - the home of the Inn at Little Washington - a destination in and of itself. We took our time getting there, stopping at Virginia wineries on the way (not the best wine, but hey, it's wine, who cares?) and cozying up at a B&B before going to the Inn for dinner. It was only one night, and it was snowing and cold, but it was heaven. We hope to go back in 2014.
Best meal - My pregnancy interfered a bit with my foodie tendencies, so unsurprisingly my best meals were enjoyed before and after. It's a toss up between The Inn at Little Washington (see above - in February) and Minibar (in December). Both of these meals were ridiculously overpriced, but to me, it was worth it. Wine flights and multiple courses (over 20 at Minibar!) - sign me up!
Best movie - I don't get out to the movies much these days. But I did thoroughly enjoy This is the End this past summer, so much so that I devoted an entire blog post to it. It was weird. And stupid. But I laughed out loud in a theater by myself, so that says something.
Best day - November 13, 2013. Duh! I got to meet this guy:
Second best day - October 5, 2013 - my sister's wedding. Beautiful!
Best girl's night out - December 12, 2013. Some of my friends took me out to Rosa Mexicano to celebrate my 35th birthday, the arrival of Colin, and the termination of my nine month sobriety. It was a fabulous night, with some fabulous women - including fellow bloggers Valerie and Darcy, a good friend from high school, a good friend from college, and three of my best friends from DC. Worlds collided, and it was awesome. How could it not be when there is tequila involved? (You can even see a picture of me getting a shot disguised as a cake on Darcy's blog - scroll to the bottom).
Best kids excursion - To the National Zoo, in August. I actually usually hate the zoo, but it was raining that day - who knew the best time to visit the zoo is in the rain? It was empty, and for the first time, I felt like I could handle my two kids in a public place without yelling or running or losing my shit. It was a good day.
Best Blog Post on My Blog - My favorite ones are never the most popular ones, but I think my best of the year is this one: I'm in Love with a Boy. The most popular one this year, by far, is this one: Why are Lawyers so Miserable?
Best Blog Post on Any Blog- Kelle Hampton's birth story on the arrival of her son on her blog, Enjoying the Small Things, had me in tears. (And if that one makes you cry, check out the birth story of Nella, her daughter born with down syndrome - have tissues ready).
Best Beauty Product - Ummmmmmmmmmmm. This one is a joke, people. I am lucky to get a shower every other day, let alone wear make up or use anything to preserve my aging skin. I do use Pantene, by the way. High quality stuff.
Now mosey on over to Darcy's blog, No Monsters in my Bed, to see her Best Of list!
Sunday, January 5, 2014
Okay, 2014
Last year, in lieu of resolutions, I drafted a mission statement of sorts. It was sentimental and hopeful and a bit poetic. I guess I was successful at some of them, but like all resolutions (or mission statements), the romance of it was gone after a week or so, and I forgot at times what my "mission" was.
This year's resolution list won't be so idyllic. Instead, it will be hard, measurable goals that I aspire to accomplish. Such as:
- Lose eight pounds. (How original of me.) I am not going to promise to exercise X number of times per week, or cut out any major food groups for any lengthy period of time, but here ye, here ye, I proclaim now: I will lose these remaining pregnancy pounds.
- Get an uninterrupted night's sleep. This is not so much up to me, as it is to the cute little baby staring at me as I type this. But I WILL get him sleeping through the night, in the not so distant future. And by the time we are ringing in 2015, he will be getting 12 hours of solid, continuous sleep. Ahhhh, that will be nice.
- Keep blogging - at least once a week. If you haven't noticed, my posting frequency has correlated directly with the arrival of the aforementioned baby this past November. There are weeks that I think there's no way I'll get it together to post, but at the end of the day, I am always glad that I do. Because if I stop, this little blog of mine will fall to the wayside and disappear, and I have gotten so much out of it in the past three years that I refuse to allow that to happen!
- Use my spa gift certificates. I have two sitting in a drawer right now (one to Bliss, one to Red Door). I refuse to forget about them.
- Do sit ups with some sense of regularity. After three pregnancies, it's not pretty. Who knows if sit ups will even help, but at least I can say I went down fighting.
- Have dinner with my girl friends. At least once a month. And take a taxi so I can have more than one margarita.
There you have it. I've capped it at 6.
You may notice that none of these resolutions has anything to do with my parenting. That's because I've learned that you can't make any promises in that department. All you can have is good intentions. So I'm not going to say I won't ever yell, or I'll always serve nutritious foods, or that I'll strictly limit their screen time. I'm going to make mistakes, and I'm not always going to be a model parent. I'm not going to vow otherwise and set myself up for failure.
But I am going to do the best I can. And if I can stick to the resolutions above, I'll be a happier person. And, hence, a better mom. If I take care of me, I can take better care of them.
And that's what we all should do!
Below is a graphic from OTC Safety which summarizes some of the most common resolutions moms make. Apparently only 46% make it past January. Hopefully I can beat that statistic! But the message is clear - take care of yourself! Make it a priority.
Here's to a healthy, happy 2014 for all of us!
Disclosure: I received compensation for this post as part of the CHPA OTC Safety Ambassador Program. All the opinions reflected here are my own.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Skipping Back to Work
The timing of Colin's birth coincided almost perfectly with the holiday season. He was born just a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving, and then of course Thanksgiving ran into Hanukkah which then ran into Christmas and New Year's. As a result, I've been fortunate enough to have a lot of family come to help, and my husband was also able to take a few weeks off of work.
That's the good part of having a baby over the holidays.
The downside is that the older boys have been off of school. A LOT. AND WE ARE ALL GOING STIR CRAZY!!!!
Winter break sucks.
What I've learned in my five years of parenting boys is that they have to be run. Like dogs. They need to burn energy and have space, or there will be repercussions, generally in the form of obnoxious/violent/alarming/crazy/annoying/relentless behavior. What this means is that you have to get boys out of the house - to parks, to open areas, to activities, to something. Unfortunately, with the cold weather and the around the clock nursing, we haven't been able to get out as much as we've liked. Thus, the boys have excess energy combined with idle time, which is a recipe for disaster. Add to that the fact that I have a seven week old baby to contend with, and I'm kind of losing my shit.
That's the good part of having a baby over the holidays.
The downside is that the older boys have been off of school. A LOT. AND WE ARE ALL GOING STIR CRAZY!!!!
Winter break sucks.
What I've learned in my five years of parenting boys is that they have to be run. Like dogs. They need to burn energy and have space, or there will be repercussions, generally in the form of obnoxious/violent/alarming/crazy/annoying/relentless behavior. What this means is that you have to get boys out of the house - to parks, to open areas, to activities, to something. Unfortunately, with the cold weather and the around the clock nursing, we haven't been able to get out as much as we've liked. Thus, the boys have excess energy combined with idle time, which is a recipe for disaster. Add to that the fact that I have a seven week old baby to contend with, and I'm kind of losing my shit.
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