So remember that crazy celebrity wedding I wrote about a few months ago? The one with the nine foot wedding cake? The one that is actually going to be televised on the TLC series, DC Cupcakes, this Friday at 10pm? You may remember, I went a bit crazy preparing for that wedding. Weight loss. New dress. Spray tan. Hair and makeup. The whole spiel.
A few weeks ago my husband got a consent form in the mail requesting consent for his appearance on the reality show. It was addressed to him and his guest. Ooooo, how exciting! I knew all my preparation was worth it!
But it wasn't to be. My husband's colleague, who actually married the celebrity bride, quashed all my dreams last week when he informed us that though my husband will make a split second appearance on the show, I will not.
WTF! Did my husband stand naked spread eagle for some random stranger to spray his innards with a can of brown paint? No he did not.
Whatever. I am over it. Because you know what? I've already had my time in spotlight.
You probably don't know this about me, but back in 1999, I was a celebrity in my own right. For like, a whole minute. While studying abroad in London, I was featured on the BBC show "World of the Secret Camera," which is Britain's version of "Candid Camera."
How? Why? Where? I was in London walking through a Pottery Barn type store, when I passed a shelf of glassware and heard it all crash to the ground. Convinced I caused the demolition (because I had an enormous "I am an American backpack" on my back), I freaked and offered to pay for the damage. Little did I know it was all a big joke and I was being filmed. Apparently, my reaction was unique, and I was invited to be a guest on the show itself.
I wasn't nervous at all for the taping. I was over-confident in fact. And then I totally choked. CHOKED.
You want to see for yourself? Here you go (I come in after 8 seconds):
A few notes on this:
1) The reason I had a big fat backpack on was because I was on my way to the airport to go to Paris. I met my ex boyfriend at the airport and was like, "Um, a crazy thing happened to me today."
2) Oh my God was I skinny. No muffin top at all? None? Me? How? Why?
3) I still have that necklace. I wore it a few weeks ago.
4) In the "candid" version of the video, where I didn't know I was being taped, I was wearing contacts. And I looked showered. With makeup on. And painted nails (!). Who is this girl?
5) Shortly after this interview, five of my friends and I wreaked havoc on the green room and showed the British what 20 year old unable to drink in the U.S. girls can really do when they have access to free, legal alcohol. They ended up giving us a car to take us into Covent Garden just to get rid of us.
So will my husband make a fool of himself on camera as I did? We can only hope. Tune in on Friday night to see.