Friday, June 10, 2011

Not Feeling the Love

Today's post was supposed to be called "Boys," where I planned on discussing my recent potty training experience (doesn't that sound so compelling?).   I pondered entitling it "Penises," but thought that may be offensive to some, which is kind of ridiculous.  But I digress.

To be honest, it's just not what's on my mind this morning.  And in the three short months since I have started this blog, I have found that the best posts are the ones where I don't plan and the writing just flows - where I am the most sincere.

So what is on my mind this morning?  Mean people.

I get the occasional nasty comment on this blog.  That is only expected, really, so I generally try to shrug it off.  But yesterday it felt like there was a flood of them - so much so that I couldn't sleep last night and had to take a sleeping pill for the first time in two week (whine, whine).

The first hit?  I got a comment to my "Hope" post which went something like, "I hope Braden stops being a brat soon."  I can't remember the exact wording, because I was so horrified I deleted it from existence immediately.  Insult my son?  I don't think so!  Who does that?  I don't know why it bothered me so much, but it did.  I didn't even tell my husband (until now - honey, wasn't that mean?).

Then, I saw on google analytics that the site was referenced on a discussion on DC Urban Moms.  (You can see the thread here.)  This website is a local discussion forum, and someone posted asking for recommendations for mom blogs.  Someone responded with my blog (thank you, whoever you are!), which resulted in some responses basically saying that my blog sucks.  For example:

" get[s] old fast.  She seems to have just two themes: ''I'm not at work' and 'I'm getting so famous!''

"I agree.  It's not interesting because she never seems to get out of the house.  It's all just watch tv and wait for [her husband] to come home."

 I am fighting the urge to defend myself on both of these comments, because I feel that they aren't true.  On the other hand, I find myself wanting to please these two people, by writing posts that they will enjoy.  How ridiculous it that?

In general, I am a pretty agreeable person.  I don't have any enemies (I don't think!), and I tend to get along with everyone.  I don't like hostility and confrontation.  So while tossing and turning in bed last night, I couldn't stop thinking: Why don't these people like me?  Why are they so mean?

It's funny what people say when they are anonymous.   It says a lot about human nature, I think.  To be sure, I'm not a picture of virtue - I certainly rip apart all the Bachelor contestants.  When I was in junior high, I was systematically mean to a classmate, and am still haunted by it.  I tortured my younger sister throughout my childhood.  And I'll admit, I have written some snarky things on DC Urban Moms myself.

It's just part of life, I guess.

But for the record, Braden is not a brat.  He is a typical two year old boy who has had trouble adjusting to a new sibling.  Yes, he definitely has his moments.  But he happens to be the most loving, amazing, funny toddler I know.


  1. If you want to see mean then you should read this Urban Moms thread on Kelly Hampton - they ripped her and her downs syndrome daughter to shreds (talk about hitting below the belt). On the other hand Hampton is one of the most famous mom bloggers in the world and I'm pretty sure neither her nor her husband have jobs outside the blog. So i guess it comes with the territory. Further, look at poor Ashely after the love of her life ripped her to shreds off camera (that was just painful). Anyways, try not to let it get you down.

  2. @Darcy, thank you, it really means a lot! And thank you for your comments on the DC Urban Moms thread. I love your blog (and also Kelly Hampton's blog!). And you are right about Bentley - what an ass.

  3. I hope Ashley finds love before she has to listen to Bentley's behind the scenes statements. Really hope. And if it helps I was up til midnight last night checking the DC Moms Thread and trying to prepare myself for the criticism coming my way. I can feel it coming, I feel like I need armor or something.

  4. Hehe... you'll have to get plenty thick-skinned if you want to continue the blogging. You'll have finally arrived when you start getting hate mail! When I got my first hate mail, I was rather excited. Like, OMG, I'm famous! Everyone's a critic. Just ignore the trolls and you'll be just fine.

  5. @ Proto Attorney - thank you! My skin is getting thicker by the day. :) I've been reading your blog - I have my fingers crossed for a good outcome for your recent interview!

  6. I found you from the same DCUM discussion b/c my blog was also listed. Can I give you some advice from a long time blogger and fellow attorney? Feel free to ignore it.

    Let it go. If you are going to blog you have to let criticism go. I have had some HORRIBLE things said about me. It gets easier. And eventually you just stop reading it.

    It is hard. I used to respond to it. I once wrote a whole blog entry responding to a whole blog entry written about me. And then I just stopped. And now I barely read it anymore.

  7. This is exactly why I could never have a blog (even though I love reading others'). I'm far too sensitive and would take every comment to heart. ((hug))


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